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from the start.

2008-09-04 1:13 p.m.

The Thunderclouds are back.

I don�t know where to begin. These past few days have upended my world. Expecially yesterday.

Last week, my daughter Lori went for her MRI that ended up taking 2 hours. During this time, she was also scheduled for a test of her stomach. They wanted to go into the stomach with a camera and look around.

Everything was pretty normal until yesterday morning. The phone rang and Lori said, �Hi.� I know my daughter well. We talk probably 10 times a day about a veriety of things. When she said hi, she sounded like she usually did when she first wakes up. But I knew it was more that that. Before she spoke another word, my stomach was in my throat. I well never forget the next few words as long as I live.

"Mom? The doctor just called. There is still a cat scan they want to do and they want to draw fluid from my spine, but the radiologist and the neurologist both agree. They said I have MS.�

My world came to a screeching halt. This is a bad dream. This can�t be happening. She is my baby. She is only 34. She has been on pain killers for o8 years since a car accident messed up her back. She has managed to work here and there, raising 3 girls by herself and now running everywhere for Terry and me. She does not deserve this! And this morning was her camera in the stomach test which shows she has 2 ulcers.

Since way back 9 years ago when Terry lost his first foot, I have lived by the mantra, �Some people say, �Why me?� I say, �Why not me?� I mean, of course that I am no more deserving than anyone else of good health and happiness. I am not entitled to go through this life in any better condition financially, medically, nor more beautiful than anyone else.

Somehow that mantra only works for self and spouse and not for children. When it comes to my baby, I can only say, �Why her?�

She told me she almost wasn�t going to tell me because she didn�t want to add any more to my problems. I almost cried. I told her I would have been devastated if she had kept this from me. I told her that she has me and hubby, her daughter, brother and many other family to support her. I told her �We� will get through this. I am trying to be strong for her but this is killing me. Please pray that the doctors are wrong. Please pray the x-rays were misread. Thank you.

Later,
Cosmic

|

yesterday's gone/tomorrow's coming

- - 2009-07-27
- - 2009-07-07
- - 2009-06-29
- - 2009-06-26
- - 2009-06-09


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