Friday, Dec. 03, 2004 11:26 P.M.
Hi There. Hey Been busy. Haven't updated. Still busy. Ok, I lied. Not really busy. Just lazy. Been reading though. Been waiting. Hubby finally got his diaability settlement from England. Check is in the mail. Still waiting. Should be a good Christmas..... ....and waiting. All is not wonderful though. Landlord is showing the house again tomorrow at 2:00pm... And again Sunday at 2:00pm. I hate that strangers go into my bedroom and discuss how the elevator can be taken out to put back the 2nd bedroom. I hate how they stand in my kitchen and talk about how the elvator shaft can be made into a second bathroom. Like we were never here. Like we never existed. Like we don't have 8 years of memories in this place. Like my husband didn't loose two legs and me two breasts while we have lived here. Like I haven't seen three grandbabies and one great grandbaby born since we lived here. Like we didn't get married since we lived here. Like I didn't lose a sister-in-law since we moved in here. I know we have to move into another place. I know and common sense tells me that we will have new memories in a new place. Why is the terrifying me so much? I don't know, but I am incredibly sad about this. It is bothering me more than I can even put into words. I think maybe it's that when we moved into this apartment, all was well with our world. I can remember Terry walking in the door after a night at the bar with his buddies. I can remember him tiptoing upstairs when he thought I was asleep. So many memories. I don't want to move. Later, Cosmic
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